I mentioned a few months ago that I've been living with my parents for a little while. It's been mostly a positive experience, and I'm happy to be closer to my family. They haven't asked me (yet) to be observant, and I've been mostly able to live my life without too much interference from my family. I try to be a little outwardly observant (for example, wearing a kippa when in the neighbourhood and not breaking shabbos in their presence).
There have been a few arguments. My mother worries that I'm influencing my high school-aged younger brother to slack off in yeshiva. I don't think I'm responsible for this, but it is a concern of hers. At the same time, I wonder what my approach should be to him: do I promote Modern Orthodoxy? Ultra Orthodoxy? OTDness? My current approach is more or less Modern Orthodoxy, but I can understand if my mother worries I may influence him. From my perspective, of course, that would be a good thing! There's enough horrendous influences on people in UO (and probably MO) yeshivas to be crazy fanatical nutjobs, a light dose of sechel couldn't hurt, I would think.
I worry even more about my older brother, married with children, and doesn't even have an email address. He's currently going through some problems trying to figure out what he wants to do with his life. Stay in kollel forever? Get a job? Go to school? Study what? He's got a lot of big decisions to make, and by no means is he in a position of strength to make said decisions. I would have even less incentive to promote OTDness to him, considering he has a wife and kids and that's quite a lot to lose. Do I promote Modern Orthodoxy? Am I being dishonest promoting MO when I don't believe in it myself?
I also worry about my siblings' shidduchim. How much more difficult will it be for them to find a shidduch considering they have an OTD brother?
This takes me to my next point about MO vs. UO. Someone who has been raised MO has less incentive to go OTD than a UO has, I would think. The lifestyle is much more free, and is a lot closer to Conservative Judaism than UO is. UO has millions of rules and restrictions, enough to drive anyone batty, while MO is far more permissive. I'm OTD for emotional reasons the same way MO are MO for emotional reasons: we can't stand the craziness of the UO world! Yet I can't think of a single intellectual reason to be MO, but I can think of numerous emotional ones. Even as I toy with the thought of becoming more Orthodox (for emotional reasons), I wonder whether my family will be willing to be less Orthodox for emotional reasons. Aren't they so primed against any change they will never consider going MO? I found it easier going from UO to OTD, epecially considering the intellectual arguments against both UO and MO. Will they be able to find a nice balance without sacrificing too much intellectual or emotional satisfaction? It is ironic that the only reason typically attributed to going OTD (emotional reasons) are the only reasons I can see for not going OTD.